INFJs tend to be altruistic and want to make the world a better place. They look for a deeper meaning and purpose in life and are filled with a passion to pursue whatever is meaningful to them. They are very insightful and understand complex human motivations.
They are also highly intuitive and creative. They follow their “gut” or “sixth sense” a lot, which is often proven to be correct. Though sensitive and reserved, they seek deep connections with a select few. They naturally want to help others and are able to find creative solutions to complex problems.
Advocate
Altruistic, Creative, Reserved, Sensitive, Perfectionistic
Motivations: To live out their passions, and find meaning and personal fulfillment
Values: Spirituality, learning, community service, and connection
Fears: Contributing to an evil world
2% of General Population; 1% of Men; 2% of Women
Introvert (I):
Energized by inner world and alone time
Intuition (N):
Focused more on ideas, abstracts, and patterns
Feeling (F):
Decisions are made from the heart
Judging (J):
Perceived by others as organized and structured
Strengths & Weaknesses
Healthy personality types will often relate more to the strengths, while unhealthy types relate more to the weaknesses. However, most people are a combination of both.
Strengths:
INFJs are naturally empathetic and sensitive to the needs of others. Their optimistic idealism pushes others toward positive change. They connect deeply with others. They have an unwavering commitment to their convictions and values.
- Creative
- Insightful
- Principled
- Passionate
- Altruistic
Weaknesses:
INFJs are perfectionistic and idealistic, which can lead to unrealistic expectations. Their sensitivity also leads them to become upset and offended easily. They often choose to avoid conflict rather than face it. They struggle to compromise when it comes to their values.
- Sensitive to criticism
- Intensely private
- Perfectionistic
- Prone to burnout
- Conflict averse
Development
Like any personality type, INFJs can be healthy, unhealthy, or anywhere in between. Here is what they look like at their best and at their worst.
At Their Best
At their best, INFJs are altruistic idealists who want to change the world for the better. They look out for those who need the most help and are great at helping others become better versions of themselves. They’re independent with a strong intuition of knowing what needs to be done. They are passionate and strive to live out their values to the fullest.
At Their Worst
At their worst, INFJs are intensely private, sensitive, and perfectionistic. They are uncompromising and critical of others who don’t align with their values. They are also incredibly hard on themselves, holding themselves to unrealistic standards. They cannot handle conflict. They view the world as a horrible place that needs fixing.
Personal Growth
Though INFJs have many great qualities, there are always areas for any type to grow in. Here are some tips for growth.
- Learn to compromise: INFJs stand firm in their values and will not sway easily to anyone who disagrees with them. However, sometimes the INFJ can be wrong but is unable to see it. Other times even if there is a disagreement, compromising might be the best solution.
- Judge less harshly: INFJs are not known to be judgemental, but they do become disillusioned with those who don’t share their values and beliefs. Not everyone will see things the way the INFJ does, but that doesn’t make automatically make them a bad person. It simply means they see things differently.
- Learn how to receive feedback: INFJs are naturally sensitive and can take any kind of feedback or criticism very personally. It’s important for the INFJ to understand that not all feedback is meant to be insulting. It can help them grow just as they often want to help others grow.
Managing Conflict
Typically, INFJs communicate in a relaxed reserved way. They are often quite, supportive, and encouraging to others. They like harmony and cooperating with others. They do not like the direct approach to conflict. When confronted, they can appear indecisive, passive, and defensive.
When INFJs find themselves in conflict with others, it’s important for them to not avoid it. It will be hardest for INFJs to communicate with those who are too direct or overstimulating. Their passivity and sensitivity will not always be appreciated. When under stress, INFJs tend to accept and submit to what others want. However, with those closer to them, or when it comes to their values, they may pressure and dictate others. Here are some tips for INFJs to manage conflict:
- Sometimes being direct and to the point is necessary when there is a decisive right and wrong
- Set clear limits and boundaries, because you will often take too much upon yourself
- Provide data and facts to back up your points
- Understand that feedback doesn’t mean someone is against you personally or that there is something wrong with you; it’s just an area for growth
Types they may struggle to communicate with:
Nurturing INFJs
To take care of an INFJ, it’s important to know what stresses them out and what they need to fill at ease. Below are some stressors for INFJs, and also what others can do to help them feel cared for.
Stressors
- Tension from conflict
- Large social gatherings and interacting with new people often
- Tasks that require a lot of details
- Personal failure
- Criticism from those they care about
Nurture
- Allow a safe space for conflict resolution
- Give them lots of alone time and space
- Allow them to share their big picture ideas
- Ask what they learned from their mistakes
- Lots of encouragement
The Human Connection 